This book is about coming to a place of truth by first inviting us to realize what is false and then subsequently inviting us to let go of that falsehood. It is about realizing that nothing is actually about you, your sense of control is an illusion, and that your self’s resistance to the present moment is what’s preventing you from seeing the truth. It gives you tools for seeing what you are, by pointing out to you what you are not. But this book is only the starting point, the first step in seeing the truth. The brunt of the work has to be done internally by you. Try asking yourself these questions and think about them sincerely and intensely:
- If I were not here in this exact moment, would the present moment still be taking place? That is, does this moment depend on me being here?
- How did this body come about? How does one build an eye ball? Or a spleen? Do I have any control over how this body came about or did it come through forces beyond my capacity to understand?
- When something unpleasant happens, is it the actual event that’s the source of my pain or is it my ideas of what things should be like that are causing me pain? If I’m experiencing pain or discomfort, have I felt this pain before? When was the first time I felt this pain?
- When something good happens, is it the actual event that is inherently good or is my experience of it being good based on an expectation or something I learned to be “good”? Would this experience always be deemed as good by every person in the world?
- To what extent can I control my external environment? Is that feeling of control true or is it an illusion to give myself comfort?
- Am I my emotions? Am I my mind? If I think that is the case, what happens to my being if I’m not having a thought or emotion?
- If I remove all of the things that cannot be me, what remains?
You can arrive at the truth without reading this book and instead asking yourself questions like this that cut through what’s false, but it can be useful to have sign posts along the way. If you do read this book, I’d also recommend The Untethered Soul. Summary of the main takeaways are below, I’ve also added the video version.
Part 1: Your Mind Is Getting in Your Way
The first barrier in seeing the truth is that you personalize the present moment. It goes from the neutral fact of “something that is happening” to your perception of “something that is happening to me” or “something that affects me personally”. We fail to realize that our consciousness is just happening to see a small sliver of time and space at any given moment and that the causes of that particular event are way beyond our comprehension.
If it rains on our picnic we think about how our picnic is ruined instead of wonder in awe about the fact that water just falls from the sky sometimes; that the earth has its own irrigation system and we happen to be witnessing it at this moment. Did this rain come down specifically to ruin your picnic or did a million different weather events culminate to create this rain right now? Furthermore, is this the only rain that is happening on the planet? Why do you care about this particular moment of rain and not some other moment?
We must first realize that the present moment is not about us. It is the result of everything that has happened before. If we think about this deeply enough, we might realize that the present moment is the result of 14ish billion years of cause and effect since the creation of the universe, all of which led to this exact moment in time. And we have the audacity to think it should be different because we want it to be? Come on.
But it’s not our fault. The mind does this because that’s its job. Our primary mode is that of survival and since our brain is unable to experience the external world directly in that pitch black cave of our cranium, it depends on our senses to paint a picture of what is happening externally. Based on that, it creates a template for how the world is and pushes us toward things that it believes will help our survival. Basically, it does what it has to for us to be okay, but that also means that it takes neutral events and personalizes them.
An example: if we see a rattlesnake on the ground that is a very different experience than if we see a butterfly. The experience of a rattlesnake feels bad and thus we condition ourselves to avoid that experience in the future to avoid that negative emotion. Whereas the experience of a butterfly feels really nice for a bit and then you move on with your day. However, your brain remembers what that felt like and clings to that feeling. You want more. Both holding on to what it was like to find a butterfly and pushing away what it was like to find a rattlesnake prevent you from moving on. You’re still clinging to those experiences and preventing yourself from seeing what is.
These create a filter in your perception, where you are looking for the experience of a butterfly and looking for rattlesnakes in order to avoid them. This programming stays in your mind and colors everything around you, it filters your experience of the world. Think about the things you want and the things you want to avoid in your life right now. These can run your life if you don’t make an effort to see them for what they are. So ask yourself: what are you clinging on to? What are you resisting? If you’re deathly afraid of snakes, you’ll see them pop out at you everywhere, perhaps you’ll mistake one for a water hose or even just a stick on the ground. The whole world is a Rorschach test for these things that you cling on to or resist.
This is the root of suffering. Instead of accepting the external world as it is, you suffer because you want it a certain way. It is the difference between how things are and how you want them to be. Realize that you are one small piece of the whole universe and that the universe is not going to unfold exactly how you want it to. Can a single water molecule resist against the forces of the ocean? Perhaps instead of comparing the present moment to what you think it should be, you could compare it to what it’s like in the vacuum of space, compare it to nothingness.
Part 2: A Better Use for Your Mind
The second step is to realize that, much like you experience whatever is happening outside of you, you are also experiencing whatever is happening inside of you. You are not your thoughts or your emotions, you are experiencing your thoughts and emotions.
Thoughts may be created purposely (try saying “hello” in your mind right now or picturing an elephant) or they might materialize out of the ether. The latter is much more common and happens so often we likely don’t even notice it. Same with emotions, they seem to come up out of your being, sometimes overwhelming you with their force. The goal would be to let whatever thought or emotion that comes up flow through you and disappear on its own without clinging on to it or resisting it. Simply surrender to the experience and allow it to pass through.
This isn’t easy because our mind will always think it’s right, that it’s experience is valid and true. The problem with listening to thoughts and emotions is that these are tied to our preferences, our traumas, and our baggage. They’re tied to our perception of what is good and what is bad, which if you think about it is just something that has been imprinted on you throughout your life. For example, think about what you consider beautiful in a person you’re sexually attracted to. How much of this is due to societal conditioning vs your innate desires? Beauty standards change over time, consider the fact that what is considered beautiful by you or by society at large will not be in 100 years, or even less, and that your current preferences have been imprinted on you from external forces. Where else might this be the case?
Really take the effort to think about this. If you feel bad internally because of something that happened externally, the default reaction is to try to change the external. This avoids the problem and ensures that it will come back again later. The only solution is to address the problem at the root: it’s an internal problem so you need to address it internally.
Instead of trying to control the mind or control your emotions, realize that there’s a reason why they are the way they are and a reason for what thought or emotion you are currently experiencing. Genuinely ask yourself why the mind is saying this or why this emotion is coming up and peel back the layers that way. Once you get to the root, you’ll be able to let go, and you must let go of who you currently think you are to be who you really are.
This is how you can use the mind purposefully: instead of using it to worry about things that aren’t in your control, use it to contemplate what is true.
Whenever a thought or emotion comes up that you want to either cling to or resist, see them as an opportunity for growth. The more you are able to witness these and push through the discomfort of working through them, the more you are able to surrender to the reality of the moment. Meditation can be helpful here, as it will teach you how to be present and conscious within, regardless of what thoughts or emotions come up. Whenever you feel the push or the pull of those energies simply relax. Allow them to be fully. Tell yourself:
“I am okay with this experience right now, and I am not that but I am the one that is observing that.”
That is living from a place of surrender, but this is only the first step in realizing the truth. Once you are able to create a distinction between subject and object, between the witness and the experience (including thoughts and emotions) ask yourself: is the witness the ultimate truth or is it just another illusion that my ego is clinging on to? What would happen if this internal witness were to disappear?
Thanks for reading!
The JJ Experiment 